Shelby Lynne

Hey, the new Shelby Lynne CD "Just A Little Lovin'" is great! I got it a couple nights ago and have been listening. It's nine covers of songs originally done by Dusty Springfield and one original written by Shelby Lynne. It's done in a spare, understated style. No big orchestra or vocal histrionics -- just a quiet attention to the lyrics and the feeling they evoke. A real gem!

Hillary, Obama and Other Random Blips

So, Hillary fights on. I love it! She is making me believe in miracles. It's a little odd how devoted to the success of her candidacy I have become -- considering I started out supporting Obama. I remember watching his speech at the Democratic convention in 2004 and feeling electrified by it. I had already signed up to receive his campaign updates after having read a story about him. I sat through and recorded his speech announcing his presidential campaign and we all had his bumper sticker on our cars. He was fresh and forward-thinking and did not seem mired in old politics.

I was also mad at Hillary after having liked her for many years. I did not like that she did not renounce the Iraq war and I hated that she got embroiled in a bid to ban flag burning. Her actions seemed so calculated to walk a middle line and try and be all things to all people that it made me mad, although I knew the politics behind her actions.

But, when Obama decided to have a homophobic gospel singer lead his southern gospel tour, my disappointment with him was greater than anything I had experienced with Hillary. Perhaps because I didn't see it coming. At that moment I recognized him for what I believe he is: a deeply calculated politician who will do anything to win. Yes, he speaks out against gay-bashing and advocates civil rights for gays. Yet, when the chips were down, he refused to not have this man represent him. He wanted the conservative, religious black vote and figured he could appease gays by showing support in other ways. I haven't given his campaign a penny since. Not that that means anything to him, of course. I read today that he raised $55 million in February. Well, if money buys you the presidency he should have it locked up. But, I love how Hillary keeps spoiling his victory party. She is one feisty woman.

I loved Tina Fey's skit about "Bitch is the new black!" Great. Women are doing it for themselves.

You know, although I'm black, female, lesbian and an immigrant, my area of identification and greatest vulnerability has always been my femaleness. I was not drawn to Obama because he is part black. I was drawn to him for the reason most people are...his ability to move our emotions with words. A very powerful -- and very dangerous -- ability. With Hillary I feel protective because I see and hear the insidious sexism in almost every comment on her. It's really appalling how much of it there is. Once you see it, it's as if it's everywhere.

For example, I listen to Andrea Mitchell on NBC -- who is following Hillary's campaign -- and the sarcasm and contempt in her voice and the words she chooses in doing her stories on Hillary are truly amazing. Chris Matthews of MSNBC is another one. He is a guy who truly loves and is a student of the political process but his sexism and really -- craziness -- just spews from him. The guy is really nuts. Put he, James Carville and John McCain in a room together and lock the door and see who can outcrazy the others. Any bets?

And, Maureen Dowd...don't get me started on her. She is a hater of the first order. I kind of wonder if she hates all successful women or just women in general. It really lessens the credibility of anything she has to say.

I wrote a letter to the Democratic National Committee today venting about the fiasco here in Florida. We, the people, voted on the day set by our state and we are being told our votes are not going to count. Hell, no! They need to fix it and fix it fast. Petty infighting over rules should not be allowed to hold sway. The DNC is acting as if the rest of the system is so great. This primary season has really been a window into the process. Caucuses, primaries, caucus and primary in the same state on the same day. Who the hell is supposed to understand this? I was at a party down the street on Saturday and talking to a woman visiting from Texas. We got on the issue of the primary and I was the one that told her she would need to attend a caucus on the evening of the day she voted. She is from Texas, for gosh sake, and didn't know it was a two-pronged process.

A mess! A stupid mess!

Attorney General

The Senate vote keeps being couched as "Bush wins another one!" Does everything need to be about winning or losing? There is no complexity to anything anymore. The whole thing bores me because I don't expect anything to change no matter who is attorney general. It doesn't matter what they say in their confirmation hearings. They all sit there and sound like reasonable people and then go into office and act despicably. Congress needs to stop acting as if these little things like nomination hearings signal some type of sea-change. The only way things will change prior to Nov. 2008 is if Congress passes some tough laws, and raises hell on a consistent basis, rather than acting as if they are trying to raise hell but are being stifled. The victim thing got old a long time ago.

Pakistan's surprise?

Why is everyone acting so surprised about the state of emergency in Pakistan? Didn't we all see it coming? It's like watching an out-of-control car careen down the street and then being surprised when it actually hits something. Do our political so-called experts and media have to get up every day and act stupid? Can't we discuss this along the lines of: "There were not a lot of viable options open to Gen. Musharraf and this action had long been held out as a next step. So, where does he go from here? It would appear to depend on how sustained and widespread the protests are, and whether his political opponents are able to garner more significant popular support. Musharraf may well regard world protestations the same way the Burmese generals do: a short-term irritant that will soon be muted once other flashpoints explode elsewhere in the world. After all, what is the U.S. to do? It has taken Musharraf's hand in marriage and the pre-nup is pretty stringent."

The Ten Republicans

Ivy,

I am so glad you are having a good day! Thanks for sending me your thoughts on last night's Republican presidential debate. What do I think? Hmm! Well...even a cold day in hell would not cause me to vote for any of the ten. The amount of macho bluster on display last night was truly disturbing. Every time I get some faint sense that perhaps we have evolved as humans I end up experiencing something like the showboating last night and my hopes are dashed.

I mean, come on, "I'll follow him to the gates of hell!" When McCain blurted that little nugget I started laughing. He was so eager to project this tough-guy image he at times sounded like a nervous kid talking to the school assembly for the first time. I actually thought Romney came off the best of the lot -- because he's got good looks, polish, and natural presence -- although he has become such a whore in the service of his ambition that he is perhaps the most dangerous.

The others can almost be dismissed: Giuliani desperately dredging up his 9/11 credentials (What are they exactly? I respect the fact that he was out on the streets appearing to rally people on that dreadful day. Considering that our country's President was nowhere to be seen for many hours, Giuliani's face was a welcome sight. But, beyond that, what exactly are his security credentials other than his million-dollar security consulting contracts once he left office? Remember the egregious examples of police abuse that took place during his tenure as mayor?) to prove that he would be the "Security President"; three candidates who say they don't believe in evolution -- God help us! and yes, I am being ironic; and saying how great overturning Rove v. Wade would be.

I wonder how many of them have paid for their girlfriends or wives or daughters to have abortions? Shouldn't all these guys who crow about the sanctity of a fetus' life, have fourteen or so kids and their wives have had surgery to strengthen their sagging stomach muscles? Our current President doesn't want U.S. funds used for any programs promotiong birth control but his wife has only given birth once, to twins. What's the story there and what about all his girlfriends when he was a wild and crazy guy? (Hah! As if that's ever changed. I give you, as proof, the wild and crazy six-plus years we have had under his so-called leadership!)

Anyway, I think the most telling part of the debate last night was when Tommy Thompson said (I think it was he. Hard to tell behind the uniformity of positions, language, race, gender and color of suits!) employers should have the right to fire gay employees for "Living while gay" (my language for it!). He's been in the news today saying he misheard the question and actually believes gays should be protected from such actions. Fine, I'll take him at his word that he didn't mean to answer as he did.

But, that's not the point. Fact is -- unless I zoned out through it -- I did not hear any of the other candidates chime in to say it was wrong for employers to fire anyone for being gay. They chimed in on most everything else, rarely fully answering the questions they were actually asked.

To me, their collective silence on this issue spoke loudest of all. God help us, indeed!

TC

Needing Mom

Dear Ivy,

I have been thinking about you a lot in recent days. I think what triggered it was a conversation with friends where we were joking about the fact our son came home to stay for a few days while he got over the worst of a new head cold. He said he did not want his girlfriend to catch it -- therefore he came home with apparently no thought to the fact he could infect the three of us living here. In his book, health of girlfriend ranks above health of parents and brother.

We joked about it (privately, of course) but I think his coming home was more basic: he wanted to be taken care of by his mommies. His first day home he asked if we would make him soup, and quite obviously expected to be fussed over. Although I would roll my eyes, when my back was turned to him, I could also not help thinking about the fact it was only in recent years I stopped wishing for my mommy when I became ill. It surprised me to realize I no longer have that visceral reaction to being ill. When did it cease? Probably when I had to place you in a nursing home.

Although you had been ill for years prior to that, you were still living at home and I could visit you there and you were still, for me, home. Now, I visit you in a place where you are one of many and I have to keep abreast of the particulars of your daily existence: Are you eating solids? Have you lost weight? Do you have any bedsores? The act of being the caretaker has changed my emotional response to getting sick. Now my soul does not long for you to take care of me, it simply longs for communication...a conversation.

My dear, dear Ivy, you have been the best of friends and the most loving and caring of parents. I know you love my letters and save them and I love writing to you -- even if you never read them.

I love you always.

TC